Over two years since my last post, yet
things are so the same... but different. The wonderful person who suggested to me “what if the world is perfect” is now dead, but I will never forget his message. I am still forgetting to change the radio station after listening to the Canucks games, so I'm still waking up to the
news on CFAX. And the news is still pissing me off, as it reminds me that it is primarily idiots who hold the positions of power in
this world. Furthermore, the Conservative party of Canada is still
the government, even worse they have a majority now, and they are
still winning us fossil of the year awards at the international
climate change summits. But, the Green party has a seat in
parliament, in my riding even, a seat that was previously held by a
Conservative. I canvased for Elizabeth
May, and helped her win that seat for the Green party. I no longer feel powerless, my anger and
frustration moved me to action and I created change.
I am still a member of Made in Bangs!
Although we are on an indefinite hiatus and none of us live in Victoria anymore (I don't live very far away though). In
between my last blog post and now, Made in Bangs! lived under the
same roof for a time, but now none of us even live in the same city.
We still haven't completed our album, and it's still waiting for live
drum tracks.
I no longer feel we sit perched on the
precipice of apocalypse. we have past the end of the Mayan calendar
without incident, and although this screws up my retirement plan (as
in I will now have to have one) I am happy we have made it to 2013. I
feel many people are waking up, and realizing the importance of being
their own unique individual and are beginning to understand how our
own individuality is what unites us as one.
There are still senseless wars, and in
many ways the outlook for humanity seems even more grim than it did
two years ago. North Korea has just tested another atomic bomb,
school shootings are increasingly ubiquitous, the near collapse of
the economic system has come and gone with barely any reform of
unstable financial practices, and the environment is under greater
threat than ever with oil pipeline projects being pushed forward as
environmental assessments/regulations are being all but eliminated.
Yet now, these things are sources of inspiration rather than despair.
People all around the world are rising up and demanding change for
the better, from the Egyptian spring, to the occupy wall street
movement, to public outcry against pipeline projects. Sure many
governments are doing everything in their power to ignore and
discredit these movements, but others are taking bold steps towards
real sustainable change. The government of Ecuador has given
constitutional rights to the environment, and similar drafts of
legislation have been written by groups in the United States and
other countries. Many governments may not be ready to give these kind
of rights to nature, but there is a growing number of people who are
increasingly vocal about their desire for it. In Bolivia there are
impressive initiatives to develop a resource sector that will
grow their green economy. Bolivia has one of the worlds largest
deposits of lithium, which is used in modern battery technology. Not
only do they plan to harvest this resource, which will be extremely
valuable in coming years as electric cars become more popular and the
world moves away form fossil fuels, they plan to make it into
batteries themselves rather than selling the raw resource to other
countries. This plan to develop their economy around a “green
energy” may well propel Bolivia from a poor country to a major
player in world energy in the decades to come. Canada
should really be taking a lesson from this small south American
country, because as we are rushing to build infrastructure around our
fossil fuel resources in the name of economic growth and getting what
we can from these resources while there is still a market for it on
the global stage, we may well be undermining our economic future.
Spending money on an energy source which is unsustainable and while
there are world wide initiatives to transition away from fossil fuels
can only be considered a colossal mistake made out of short sighted
greed. Yes there is still a great demand for oil, and yes we are
fortunate to have a lot of it, but we also are rich in many other
green energy sources, but we are falling behind in our development of
these resources which will undoubtedly be the future of the energy
sector. We should be keeping as much of our fossil fuels as we can,
so we can use them as needed in the development of our green energy
sources. If we build wind farms, we are still going to need to use
trucks to get the turbines to the project sites. The quicker we
develop our green energy resources, the sooner we can discontinue our
use of oil and the more of it we can keep in the ground where it
belongs.
That last bit about how Canada should
be taking a lesson from Bolivia, is actually the whole point of all
of this, when things don't seem right it is not that they aren't
perfect, it is that there is an opportunity to learn, grow, and
change.
Keeping in your heart and mind the
notion that everything is prefect is often extremely difficult,
especially when in the immediacy of a major tragedy. It takes time to
see the opportunity a horrific event or terrible injustice presents, it can take a
lifetime. For instance, there has recently been a terrible tragedy in
Victoria, three young people lost their lives in a house fire. I knew
two of the victims, Emily and Mark. Although I had only met them a handful of times,
I knew from the first moment I met them that they were special
people. They were amazingly wonderful human beings, so genuine, so
compassionate, unbelievably intelligent, creative, and sincere. I am,
as are many, in shock of the news that they are gone. In this moment
I cannot see the perfection in this, or understand the full extent to
which this tragic loss will provide gifts, they seemed to have so
many gifts to give in life. But, I do believe in time that this
tragedy will provide something to each and every person touched by
their passing. For me, this has in part strengthened my resolve to
become a firefighter. I am currently training as a volunteer
firefighter on a small gulf island, I am finding the training
inspiring and the more I learn, the more I can picture myself
thriving in this career.
Strangely enough, the night this fire
claimed these young lives, before I had learned of this tragedy,
perhaps even simultaneous to it, I had a dream of a house fire:
I was moving out of the house where I
lived with Fred. (the man who said to me “what if everything is
perfect” and who recently lost his battle with cancer. In the
dream Fred was still alive, although his cancer was in an advanced
stage.) As I was moving the last of my things out of the house, a fire
started in a light fixture above front porch, it was short circuiting
and a small fire started. Fred and I believed the fire was manageable
and posed no threat. As we went about getting the fire extinguisher
and attempting to put out the fire, I realized that there was another
fire in the basement, this fire was very advanced and about to spread
to the rest of the house. I altered Fred, and told him we needed to
get out of the house immediately, in the panic of trying to evacuate
the house Fred fell. When he fell, he expressed to me that he
understood this was the end for him, this fall would cost him his
life (this is actually somewhat similar to how he died in real life,
although I wasn't there as I didn't live there at the time, but he
had a fall which led to him being admitted to
hospice where he passed away a couple days later). I
dragged Fred from the house and laid him on the front lawn. From here
I could see the fire through the basement window, it had fully
engulfed the rooms of the lower floor. Oddly, there was a rooster in
the basement window, but sadly I knew there was nothing I could do,
as opening or breaking the window where the rooster was standing
would cause a massive backdraft which would not only kill or injure
me and the rooster, but cause the fire to rapidly spread through the
rest of the house engulfing it completely and subsequently
endangering neighboring homes, so I wasn't going to do that,
especially without the fire department on scene yet. I knelt on the
ground with Fred's head in my lap as we waited for the ambulance and
fire crews to arrive. Eventually an ambulance, that was shaped like a
hearse, arrived followed shortly by the firetrucks. As they loaded
Fred into the ambulance I told Fred I was going to ride with him
where every he has going. And that was pretty much where the dream
ended.
When I heard a fire claimed the lives of these wonderful people I knew, and on the very
same night I had a dream of pulling a friend from a burning building
I decided to take that as a sign to seriously pursue a career as a
firefighter.
Although there are no words that lessen
the tragedy of the loss of a loved one, or diminish the travesties
committed by the greedy and ignorant, do remember, as hard as it may
be to understand, everything is perfect exactly the way it is.
Injustice is to motivate you to action for change, pain to make you
aware and allow you to heal. Know that everything happens for a
reason. Know that you are never powerless. And know you are never
faced with anything you can't handle, you may be pushed to your very
limit, but you will always have everything you need provided to you.
Life is a spiral, it ebbs and flows, becomes challenging, then
effortless. It is always different, but you'll always find yourself
right back where you started, the same but different.
We are all equally opposite, the same
but different.
I Love you all.
R.I.P. Fred, Emily, and Mark.
